Archives - How Do I Handle my Employer and Stay Loyal to My
Friend?
Q: The company I work for downsized to half in just the past few
years. As a result, it seems as though we are always scrambling to do a tremendous amount
of work that never seems to get finished. Recently, the Director of my unit with whom I
was friendly, was fired. I was told that it was because she wasn't doing her job, but no
one could have done her job! She was not only the Director, she had her own clients
and had to pick up the projects of 4 others who were previously laid-off staff. Last week
the President of this company called me aside and told me that while she knows she can't
"legally" tell me not to be friends with the Ex-Director, she won't trust me if
I choose to remain friends with a fired employee. I am sure that she has no right to tell
me who to be friends with but while I don't want to turn my back on my friend, I
don't want to get fired either! What should I do?
A: There
has to be a line drawn between company loyalty, and your private life and your employer
has crossed it! To be sure, jobs are important but they may not stick by your side when
times are bad. They also don't last forever, as you've doubtless already learned from the
drastic downsizing that has occurred in your company. You are right not to turn your back
on true friendship, especially when ordered to do so in a way that intrudes into your
personal life in a shocking way! No employer can threaten to fire you merely for your
friendship with an ex-employee. What you do and with whom you associate outside of the
workplace and on your own time is your business only.....unless it's a brave new world and
you're being monitored by the thought-police!
My first reaction to your situation has to do with the
serious problems with your company's management, and the unhealthy and unproductive work
environment you are in. There is a limit to the amount of work a person can do effectively
when they're assigned too many jobs and not enough resources, and while you're expected to
do your best the pressure must be immense under the current conditions. I'm wondering why
Management doesn't take the time to make some positive changes, starting by first
assessing the remaining staff and resources, and re-allocating them in such a way that the
work can be handled more effectively.
I'm also fairly certain that your boss "got
the axe" because the Management wanted to get rid of her and not because she
was unable to keep up with the workload. Inept Management would be quick to blame someone
else as being "inept" and cover for the company's troubles.
I don't understand why you would want to keep
your job under the troubled situation you are currently in. Why are you more worried about
keeping the job you have instead of looking for a better one? I would begin an active job
hunt immediately... be sure to be discreet about it.
The at-work interpersonal relationship situation
is trickier, but I would urge you to stick by your friend and not to waive your personal
rights! Keep a paper trail of all the projects you are working on along with their
completion dates, and make sure to keep your reputation strong by making yourself as
visible as possible in productive, positive ways throughout your company. Show you are a
team player and make good relationships with the powers-that-be (E.g. Your new boss).
Remember that management's eyes are focused on you because of your association with the
ex-director. Don't give them any cause to fire you or bully you into quitting! As long as
you are employed by this company you must keep your personal very private.
In the coming weeks and months more heads may
roll.... make sure yours isn't one of them. Watch your back until the door slams
behind it.... as you're leaving for a better job in a more stable company.
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