JESSICA'S TAKE:

ADVICE SISTER JESSICA’S TAKE:

It needn't be horrible to be alone on the holidays. Even if you are not by yourself, many of our suggestions can help you put the real spirit back in the holidays....and we hope you get inspired by them.

Remember the spirit of giving. Volunteer to visit shut-ins or serve a holiday meal to those who need it at a shelter or soup kitchen. You'll be with other loving, caring people keeping busy so the days speeds by. More importantly, the gratitude you'll receive from those less fortunate than you will life your spirits and make your own troubles seem small, indeed.

Create your own atmosphere of holiday cheer. Expensive commercial decorations are boring and not the only way to enjoy the holidays! Decorate your personal space at home and at work with seasonal decorations(a bowl of shiny red apples with some small pieces of pine boughs and a white candle in the middle makes a festive and inexpensive centerpiece...home-baked cookies on your tree with strings of popcorn and cranberries smell wonderful, are traditional, and fun...a menorah with colorful candles is uplifting and decorative for 8 days)!

If you've been planning to get a pet, this is a good time to choose that grateful, furry friend and spend your holidays getting to know one another. You'll have the added joy of knowing that you saved a life...but don't adopt unless you have love to give your new pet for a lifetime!

If you are a spiritual person, attending your church or synagogue more regularly, or seeking spiritual guidance, can help speed you through the holidays and hopefully inspire you to move forward with your life in a positive direction.

Get a new and better boyfriend! Buy a copy of RECRUITING LOVE: USING THE BUSINESS SKILLS YOU HAVE TO FIND THE LOVE YOU WANT today, and start creating your own personalized plan to find a better, satisfying, lasting love.

You say you're on a budget, how about getting RECRUITING LOVE: USING THE BUSINESS SKILLS YOU HAVE TO FIND THE LOVE YOU WANT as a holiday gift for single friends and family members this year? Add a small calendar to keep them organized as they write the happy ending to their own love stories in 1999. Clicking on "The Advice Sisters at Amazon.com" on the left hand side of this column will take you directly to the order form. THE ADVICE SISTERS will also gift-wrap, and send autographed copies of RECRUITING LOVE with your special message.

Write to THE ADVICE SISTERS and ask us a question at: advicesis@aol.com or advicesisters1@yahoo.com.

HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

ALISON'S TAKE:

ADVICE SISTER ALISON’S TAKE:

The holidays are often difficult even if you are part of a couple or surrounded by friends and family. The days are short and dark, loved ones are separated by impossible distances, and holiday expenses and preparations cause worry and tension. The key to creating happiness when you're solo during the holidays is maintaining a sense of perspective, advance planning, and a positive attitude." You need to take action, but also to take heart."

Avoid places where everyone is in couples or family groups. Even if the idea of "singles events" make you gag, consider them for a Thanksgiving or Christmas dinner , or New Years' Eve. At best, you won't be alone and might just might find a new love. At worst, everyone there is in the same boat...and grateful for your company.

Promise yourself that next year things will be different. Give yourself and others the ultimate "change-your-life-for-the-better" gift this year. RECRUITING LOVE: USING THE BUSINESS SKILLS YOU HAVE TO FIND THE LOVE YOU WANT by Alison Blackman Dunham and Jessica Blackman Freedman, coupled with a calendar, is one gift they won't return, recycle, or throw in the closet. Ask for it in your favorite bookstore. Online, buy the book at Amazon.com or barnesandnoble.com (just type "Recruiting Love" into the search box on the order form).

Make definite plans if you'll be home, alone. Arrange in advance when to call family and friends..it will give you something to look forward to. Stock up on foods you like. Rent a bunch of videos that inspire you or make you laugh ("It's a Wonderful Life" is a "winner").

Host a holiday party for the new friends and colleagues you have made before they leave for their holiday destinations. If you are on a budget, avoid serving alcohol and have an after-work "sweet holiday" party with just cakes, cookies, and flavored coffees (be sure to have lots of whipped cream, chocolate bits, and cinnamon for toppings). You might even make your party an ‘eating & meeting" event where everyone brings someone else that is single. You will all know at least one person and you'll meet new people–one might just be a new love!

If you get sad or upset, remember that the holiday lasts 24 hours and it's over!

HAPPY HOLIDAYS!